| Imagine the most beautiful, glamourous Supermodel. Even she has an asshole, so in Glorious Gloucestershire we have to put up with Cheltenham. |
| The Gloucestershire Senior Cup, or County Cup or GFA Trophy or whatever it is officially known as has often been the thorn in the side of local teams. It's suggested that we're forced to participate to make us eligible for the following seasons' FA Cup, not like that matters following the result at Street! |
| Last season we knocked out Mangotsfield before taking on Bristol City at Ashton Gate on a freezing cold February evening, it's always nice to play against a proper Football League side so it's a shame that this year we were drawn against Cheltenham Town, who are simply non-league in Division Three (or League Two under this season's silly rebranding scheme). |
| It seems fashionable to treat this fixture with contempt, both sides were guilty of it but having a smaller squad mean't that City's team was pretty much their best eleven whilst the Robins (poncey nickname) fielded their reserves. Whilst the only changes for the Tigers were three youth teamers on the bench and Chris Burns as a makeshift striker they had much more strength in depth. |
| First team strikers Kayode Odejayi and Damien Spencer led the line, with Scots winger Graham Fyfe on the left flank and Brian Wilson, a £50,000 signing from Stoke City at right back. As the game wore on it was plain to see how they liked to play with the two great big goons up front getting the ball to them as quickly as possible. |
| There aren't too many links between the two clubs these days. According to his programme notes Ken Turner wants to forge better links with the Robins and to lose the animosity from City fans, sorry mate, never gonna happen. It might be okay for turncoats like Mike Heather to switch sides but I hate them as much now as I did ten years ago. |
| The most alarming sight on entering Meadow Park was the excess of police in attendance, the Scummer fans had baulked at paying £7 to watch what was officially a first team fixture, even though their club had chosen to devalue it by sending the reserves. I counted sixty-four people in the segregated away end, a fair reflection on the number of their fans who were around when this clash was a regular fixture. They think they have a core support of 3500, maybe a tenth of it girls, a tenth. |
| Onto the game and Jimmy Cox might've given City an early lead after he got behind their defence but the ball didn't drop kindly and he was crowded out from shooting. The Bristol referee then booked Chris Burns for saying something after the man in black had blocked a through ball as City attacked. Surprisingly that was the Gaffer's first caution of the season. |
| City were taking the game to the professionals and for a long period at the start of the game dictated play. Cox had beaten offside but a poor bounce saw him slow to control the ball, as he turned he was scythed down by his opponent and from the ensuing free kick Neil Griffiths headed narrowly wide. |
| It was Lyndsay Parsons who complained that his slick footballing sides weren't allowed to play football against the Pub Teams from the Land of the Giants in the Dr Martens League. So it was a surprise to see the scummers from the dark side of the Golden Valley had several little 'uns among their reserves. One of them broke through and had a shot that flew high and wide. |
| Seventeen year old Dan Avery was lucky not to see a card when he brought down Fyfe but the following free kick was easily claimed by Matt Bath. Neil Mustoe had a free kick in a good position after Burns was climbed over but he dragged his set piece embarrasingly low across the pitch. |
| Due to the decision to segregate the fans, it was difficult to get a good view of what was going on at the other end so in the name of journalism I took a seat in the stand. However, this was totally spoiled by a shady character approaching several people saying "Pssst, wanna buy some cup final tickets?" only to be followed with a "Piss off Bloomer I'm trying to watch the game!" |
| There followed a period where every decision seemed to go against City as the full time prima donnas couldn't hack the rough and tumble of a contest against a Southern League side. No wonder their first team is struggling when their players wimp out of tackles and whine at will. |
| Considering the number of penalties conceeded by City so far this season Neil Griffiths was brave when he slid in to take the ball off of Fyfe as he made progress into the area. At the other end ex-Bristol City goalkeeper Scott Brown (who faced us in the County Cup in February) made an absolute mess of a simple cross. I wonder if he's related to Steve Book?!! |
| He ought to take a few lessons from Bathy, the City man showed how to do it when he picked a snapshot from Spencer out of the air with ease. |
| Damien Spencer looks as though he could be a great striker. He's strong, fast, seems to have good control but when put through, with just Bath to beat he dragged a shot across goal and wasted a great chance. Oh how it must hurt for a guy used to playing in the Football League to hear non-league fans chant "You're shit and you know you are" at him. |
| More impressive keeping from Bath followed as he kept his eye on a deflected shot to stop a soft goal. But as the half ended City had another good chance when Coxy held firm against the defender before beating him and sending a clever ball low into the area. It was just cut out before it reached Lee Smith. |
| Goalless at half time. It wasn't exactly rivetting stuff for the three hundred odd fans that made the effort to come out and watch this noddy cup game. Chris Burns started to introduce some fresh blood as youth teamer Eddie Rimmer replaced Keith Knight at left back. |
| The full timers should've taken the lead at the start of the second period as they attacked their pathetic showing of supporters. It was Spencer again, who with the whole goal to aim at could only head the ball against the base of the post and watch as it rolled back across the line and away to safety. |
| Burnsy was now getting tired and also had to endure a period where the referee gave everything Cheltenham's way (some things never change) and totally ignored the appeals of the City boss. |
| The Scummers had another great chance with a breakaway that saw a player try to round Bath but the City nummer one dived at his feet and claimed the ball. It was the end of the game for Burns after just over an hour as he was replaced by sixteen year old striker Dan Forrester. |
| Odejayi followed the example set by his striker partner Spencer as he galloped into the area, but an awful touch saw him kick the ball out for a goal kick. That's £20,000 well spent isn't it Cheltenham!!! |
| Ecclesiastical menace Heather, who was forced to resign from his position as Verger at St Pauls Cathedral following the disappearance of contents from the collection plate made an appearance on the touchline during the second half. |
| Tom Webb found Lee Smith out wide in plenty of space and the City man, now enjoying acres of space on the wing sent in a shot that just missed the post and ended up in the side netting. A third change for City followed as the Tiger's took on a very youthful and inexperienced look when youngster Jamie Reid replaced Neil Mustoe. |
| The average age of the City players was now nineteen, N-n-n-n-n-nineteen. |
| Webby became the second name in the book, like Burns it was his first caution of the campaign. He flew into a tackle and took the ball but also took the man as well. It was a fair booking but quite why it was alright for Odejayi to manhandle the City man right in front of the referee is beyond me. |
| More high jinks from Spency the Clown. Put through, one on one, his pace beat the City defence with ease and with just Matty Bath to beat his awful shot hit the exit gate at the car park end. |
| It was time for Cheltenham to start to make the changes with their more experienced players unable to break down the resilience of a Southern League side, boss John Ward introduced a few younger players. Graham Ward, the reserves Captain, a summer signing from Kidderminster Harriers was withdrawn and replaced by James Connolly. |
| Lee Smith breezed around the left back and sent in a shot with the outside of his boot that the keeper needed two attempts to hold on to. |
| The hopeless Spencer was finally withdrawn to be replaced by Luke Corbett. I'm sure there's nothing he'd have liked better than to score a goal in front of the T-End and cupped his hand to his ear in front of the City fans. Instead he got a chorus of "You're not very good" as he trudged off. |
| Ninety minutes came up with another Cheltenham header hitting the post and running away to safety. It was a great compliment that an injury ravaged City could hold a team of full time professionals to a goalless draw in a competititve match. Extra time though would be too much. |
| For the start of the extra period Ward took off Fyfe and replaced him with Andy Gallinagh (I wasn't sure how to spell that so I tried to copy and paste it from the Scum website, but they have it javascipt disabled. Wankers!) |
| The breakthrough finally came for the Robins but it was from the head of a City player. A long throw in from the otherwise unimpressive Wilson was flicked into his own net by City's Neil Griffiths. |
| Another chance fell for Cheltenham as the result was only going to go one way now. A run through the middle saw Bath again get down to snatch the ball away from the attackers feet as he tried to go around him. It was the perfect opportunity for the scummer to dive over Bath, get the City man sent off and deprive us of our goalkeeper for three games. |
| Odejayi continued his mission to unimpress his manager when put through, he volleyed wide again. No wonder they're struggling at the bottom of the division with strikers like these. We can only hope that they continue to fire blanks until May and get them relegated back into 'park football'. |
| Youngster Rimmer was cut down in a melee as City should've been awarded a penalty after Brown had dropped a simple ball. It was eventually cleared but the left back needed two bouts of treatment by someone that wasn't Adie Tandy as the referee continued his trend of giving nothing City's way. |
| The second period presented nothing for the Tigers and only gave time for the hapless Odejayi to finally get his name on the scoresheet with a tap in. |
| So City had exited from two FA Competitions in seventy-two hours, but this one didn't matter in the slightest. Youth teamers Forrester, Rimmer and Reid looked as though they might be able add some depth to the first team and City will look forward to Saturday's game against Solihull having matched a team of pro's for more than ninety minutes. |
| I'm glad that was over and out of the way. I've never liked having the scummers in our ground, good riddance to bad rubbish. |
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| Tiger Roar Man of the Match - Lee Smith |
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Lee Smith
Star Man |
After a reasonably quiet first half, City wing back Lee Smith came into his own in the second period as he found plenty of room down the right wing. If the Tigers were going to score it was always going to have some input from the City number eleven.
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